


And Karkat was the Midwife

by dontpanicbutterknife



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Crack, M/M, Mpreg, Parody, Satire, The Baby is You
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-09-15 23:23:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9263345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontpanicbutterknife/pseuds/dontpanicbutterknife
Summary: A little ditty about a guy giving birth to his best friend.Humor fic





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Baby is You](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/255119) by Toby Fox. 



> May 2016 I fell into a The Baby is You rut. Ergo, this.

"Dave how is this possible!"

"Don't worry I'm not pregnant. Just kidding I really am pregnant."

"WHAT THE FUCK" John screamed at his tummy which was the exact shape of a basketball mixed with a soccer ball mixed with a bowling ball. He smacked the ball out of his shirt but no ball fell out!!!!!!!! OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

"John... the baby... it's the baby...."

"I'm gonna kill the baby" said John, from inside Dave's womb. His man-womb. His duderus. "OH FUCK IT'S DARK"

But suddenly... KARKAT fucking VANTAS was THERE and he was... a baby. His baby umbilical cord was coming out of his alien belly button cloaca and John foolled it all the way down to his to the placenta and all the way up to his own cloaca in his own alien belly button.

"I gotta push now, John" said Dave.

"No, Dave! We have to abort the baby!!" Said Dave said John. He put his hand on Dave's shoulder and they meeked out with frenching. And Dave had a miscarriage all over the 

And John was and Karkat was the midwife.


End file.
